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How does loving someone can make you lose respect for yourself and others around you by living in denial? How do you look at that one person you love and say goodbye? The reason I ask this question is because Stella from “S Streetcar Named Desire.” In the play, Stella said "I couldn't go on believing her story and live with Stanley" (Stella, 1232) after her sister told Stella she was raped by her husband. She chose not believe her because she was blinded by her love for Stanley, and was also afraid of him. During that time period women weren't allowed to stand up for themselves. Men viewed themselves as the one in charge. Even until this day things are still the same in many countries. I think if you allow the people you love to determine how you love, you start losing sight of what is right. You will not be able to see how wrong they can be for you. I understand that Blanche was constantly lying just to make herself feel wanted, she desired a sense of belonging. This time she was helping Stella because she thought Stella deserved someone better. She well understood this side of mankind. Stella’s denial of reality proved that she had more in common with Blanche.

Sometimes it can also be the other way around. For example when I was young in Haiti, one of my neighbors had a wife that he loved so much that he never believed she was cheating on him. He would refused to believe it even if he saw it with his own eyes. She was controlling and used to abuse him mentally. He stop talking to anybody that would try making him see the truth about her. He ended up dying because of her. If he respected himself enough to know that he deserved better he would still be here until this day. He grew with a step mother who wasn’t always nice to him. Stella was broken in the beginning just as he was. He got married in his early twenties, and also had child with the wife. He finally felt like he belonged somewhere because of that he had to live in denial. People can become heartless to others for their love ones.

I thought about Charles Manson after reading the quote from Stella. While doing research online I Came across something that he was described by probation reports as suffering from a "marked degree of rejection, instability and psychic trauma" and "constantly striving for status and securing some kind of love." Other descriptions included "unpredictable". They all live in this denial reality concept of status and love, they either ended up hurting their selves, or someone else.

Feeling Good - Nina Simone
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